Onion News Network (video)

Comedy

The Onion News Network is the 24-hour cable TV news choice for billions of viewers in 811 countries. Now the hard-hitting, award-winning news you need is available anytime and anywhere you want. Subscribe and watch right now. (Author: )

Subscribe	Subscribe via iTunes™
Author
Feed	http://feeds.theonion.com/OnionNewsNetwork
Site	http://tv.theonion.com/
Badge

Recent episodes from Onion News Network (video)

Portrayal Of Obama As Elitist Hailed As Step Forward For African Americans
Published: Aug 27, 08
Overjoyed civil rights leaders say that Barack Obama has paved the way for future black politicians to be smeared as country club snobs.
Hurricane Bound For Texas Slowed By Large Land Mass To The South
Published: Aug 25, 08
Texas residents are relieved that the deadly Category 5 storm just missed them, destroying a horn-shaped land mass beneath them instead.
Californians Gather To Celebrate Annual Wildfire Tradition
Published: Aug 20, 08
Residents took part in rituals like picking through the charred remains of their homes and feigning shock that this could happen to them.
Latest Poll Reveals 430 New Demographics That Will Decide Election
Published: Aug 18, 08
A recent election poll indicates vegan independents and skydiving widowers are among the groups that will have a major impact in November.
Astronaut Suspects Nasa Using Him To Test Spaces Effects On Fat People
Published: Aug 13, 08
Mission specialist Robert Barrett first became suspicious when he noticed most of his tasks involved measuring his waist and eating cookie dough.
Chinese Officials: Deadly Virus Sweeping China Is Just Olympic Fever
Published: Aug 11, 08
The Chinese government explained that the fatal disease is caused by the excitement of the Olympics, not infected birds, as was previously reported.
'cosmopolitan' Institute Completes Decades-long Study On How To Please Your Man
Published: Aug 6, 08
Cosmo scientists have finally cataloged every single way to satisfy your man's carnal cravings by stimulating his secret sex zones.
Pentagon's Unmanned Spokesdrone Completes First Press Conference Mission
Published: Aug 4, 08
The spokesdrone will field questions deemed too dangerous for a human press secretary, whose career could be irreparably damaged by answering them.
The Beijing Olympics: Are They A Trap?
Published: Jul 30, 08
'In The Know' Panelists discuss whether our athletes will be able to escape from the bamboo cages the Chinese government will try to imprison them...
Study Finds Young People Remain Apathetic About Office Politics
Published: Jul 28, 08
Organizations hope to make youth see importance of getting prime parking spaces or a new desk lamp.
Chef Cooks 'dream Omelet' From Recipe That Came To Him In A Dream
Published: Jul 23, 08
Today Now! shares a delicious omelet recipe you can make at home with just a few simple and surreal ingredients.
Domino's Scientists Test Limits Of What Humans Will Eat
Published: Jul 21, 08
Despite ethical concerns about testing on humans, researchers say their work was necessary to determine the boundary between garbage and food.
Tiny Dog Has Been Barking Nonstop For 6 Years
Published: Jul 16, 08
Pausing only to eat, the West Highland white terrier yips and yelps 24 hours a day, according to neighbors.
'no Values Voters' Looking To Support Most Evil Candidate
Published: Jul 14, 08
Both candidates are stepping up their efforts to attract crucial 'no values voters' by abusing animals and murdering the elderly.
Congress Struggles To Come Up With Cool Name For Anti-drug Initiative
Published: Jul 9, 08
Before a new program to combat crystal meth can be put into place, Congress has to make sure it has a really awesome name